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November 9th, 2011

column: Summer Leads to Falls

SLIGHTLY OFF THE MARK

 

            Author’s note: I wrote this column in late summer, and kept it as filler in case, for some reason, something happened to keep me from writing a new one. Now, in early November, my fiancée is getting over the flu and I’m coming down with it … once you’ve read this, you’ll get the irony.

 

            Frankly, at this point I’m afraid to move.

            This summer was, in my family, a variant of Murphy’s Law that reads, “Anyone who possibly could get injured, will be.” Now, I don’t recall in exactly what order these things happened; I took notes, but when I tried to retrieve them I stabbed myself with a pen.

            But the highlight, for me, was when my fiancée received such serious injuries that people who didn’t know us thought I must have beaten her up. (People who did know us figured that if it was a fight, I’d be the one all bruised and bloody.)

We were taking a walk, which is something people do for recreation when they can’t afford a private jet. That particular area had no sidewalk (personally I think streets without sidewalks are a travesty; but as far as I know that section of street never has had one, and you can do only so much with without money. Unless you’re the Federal Government.)Collapse )

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