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Dark and Stormy Night

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The Weather Changes. Again.

Dark and Stormy Night
SLIGHTLY OFF THE MARK


            “Tragedy in Churubusco when three residents went on a walk to show off their spring clothes during the warm up this morning, and were later found frozen to death. Their bodies were originally scheduled to be cremated, but couldn’t be thawed fast enough.”

            This is why writers should live in Indiana; that kind of stuff just writes itself.

            Oh, I know, I’ve talked a lot about the weather this year. It’s only April—whatever will my columns be about in July? Heat, I’m guessing. But we came close this spring to actually having that snow tornado I used to joke about, so if you’re interested in weather at all, it’s been an interesting year.

            “Mental health officials are seeing a sudden spike in emotional breakdowns after people went out last week to mow their lawns, only to find two inches of snow on the ground.”

            You don’t even have to make it up: That actually happened to me last week, except that I went to the door to bring the dog in. His frostbite/heat exhaustion is healing nicely, by the way.

            It’s one of the few times I actually dropped the F-bomb in public. I opened the door that morning and stood there for a moment, honestly puzzled about why everything outside had a strange white coloring to it. Then the dog came storming in as if a snow tornado was chasing him, and he was covered in white. He shook himself, and a winter
storm developed in my kitchen.

            Then I looked outside and said, “What the fudge?!?!”

            Only, to quote writer Jean Shepherd, I didn’t say fudge.

            The neighbors have teenagers, but since it was early morning I’m hopeful they didn’t hear me. If they did, they probably thought something like, “Hey, they had that word when he was a kid!” Then I’d yell “Get off my lawn!” and it would be downhill from there.

            Anyway, this is Indiana. Worse, this is northern Indiana, within the range of lake effect snow while too far away to actually play in the waves, assuming the waves haven’t frozen themselves into some Salvador Dali shape.

            (Yes, I’m a small town Midwestern boy who actually knows who Salvador Dali is. Okay, I looked him up. What’s with the melting clocks? Is it August?)

            Sorry if this column seems a little disjointed: There have been so many barometric pressure changes this month that my sinuses exploded, and I’ve been off balance ever since. Which brings me back to my point: We’re used to big weather extremes, to such an extent that many people actually say “I wish it would just stay cold, instead of going up and down like this.” That’s a concept we pay for in January, when the missing Polar ice cap often lingers in the fields just outside of Huntertown.

            By the way, Huntertown wasn’t named after my family. It actually stems from the Indian world “Hunyukcoldon”, which means “The snow’s melting, grab your sandbags”.

            Anyway …

            What brought all this up was last week, when it hit the mid 70’s here in Albion. Then thunderstorms came through. Then the next day I walked out on the front porch and not only was everything covered in snow, but it felt and even smelled like winter. The next night we reached a record cold temperature. The day after that it hit 60.

            The day after that I boarded up all my doors and windows, and set fire to my boots.

            Is it any wonder everyone’s talking about the weather? I mean, except the Weather Channel. I had it on at work for eight hours the other night, and every time I glanced up I saw … no weather. Only a scroll across the bottom of the screen explaining that the weather for the next hour would be delayed by a very special episode of “Extreme Ice Road Air Rescue Fishing With The Stars”.

In their defense, thanks to The Weather Channel, I now know a great deal about tow truck drivers, steel construction workers, the Coast Guard, and Mars. Still, I can’t help thinking a name change is in order.

            But who can blame them? Reality programming gives them a chance to sit back, take a breath, and try to figure out what the fudge is going on in Indiana.



Bae hates snow
"What the -- you told me we were done with this white stuff!"

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Dark and Stormy Night

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Smoky Days and Sleepless Nights

My attempt at a press release, so people would know where the Smoky Days book sale money is going. I can’t help noticing that press releases involve a lot of bragging.

 

 

            Albion Fire Chief Steve Bushong accepts a check from local author and volunteer firefighter Mark R Hunter for recent sales of his history book about the AFD.

 

Smoky Days And Sleepless Nights: A Century Or So With The Albion Fire Department is being sold as a fund raiser for the Albion Fire Department, and first came out at the AFD’s 125th Anniversary celebration in July, 2013. The check, for $200, is in addition to sales made last summer, with all proceeds going to the AFD.

 

            Smoky Days and Sleepless Nights chronicles the fire disasters that struck Albion’s early history, efforts to form a fire department, and the first century of the AFD. The fully illustrated book, which was written by Hunter and designed and edited by his wife, Emily, sells for $9.95, and is available as e-book or in print on their website, www.markrhunter.com, or directly from Amazon.com.

 

            Locally it’s available at the Albion New Era newspaper office on South Orange Street, the Brick Ark Inn on North Orange Street, and at the Albion Fire Station on the east side of town. The Hunters can also be contacted for a copy at (260) 636-3468 or at markrichardhunter@gmail.com.

 

            Mark R. Hunter has two works of fiction set in northeast Indiana, published by Whiskey Creek Press: The romantic comedy Storm Chaser, and a follow-up short story collection Storm Chaser Shorts. He has two more books coming out in 2014.

 (Dreamwidth hates me, so the photo is on my blogger:_

http://markrhunter.blogspot.com/2014/04/local-author-that-would-be-me-donates.html

 

 

Dark and Stormy Night
My attempt at a press release, so people would know where the Smoky Days book sale money is going. I can’t help noticing that press releases involve a lot of bragging.


            Albion Fire Chief Steve Bushong accepts a check from local author and volunteer firefighter Mark R Hunter for recent sales of his history book about the AFD.

Smoky Days And Sleepless Nights: A Century Or So With The Albion Fire Department is being sold as a fund raiser for the Albion Fire Department, and first came out at the AFD’s 125th Anniversary celebration in July, 2013. The check, for $200, is in addition to sales made last summer, with all proceeds going to the AFD.

            Smoky Days and Sleepless Nights chronicles the fire disasters that struck Albion’s early history, efforts to form a fire department, and the first century of the AFD. The fully illustrated book, which was written by Hunter and designed and edited by his wife, Emily, sells for $9.95, and is available as e-book or in print on their website, www.markrhunter.com, or directly from Amazon.com.

            Locally it’s available at the Albion New Era newspaper office on South Orange Street, the Brick Ark Inn on North Orange Street, and at the Albion Fire Station on the east side of town. The Hunters can also be contacted for a copy at (260) 636-3468 or at markrichardhunter@gmail.com.

            Mark R. Hunter has two works of fiction set in northeast Indiana, published by Whiskey Creek Press: The romantic comedy Storm Chaser, and a follow-up short story collection Storm Chaser Shorts. He has two more books coming out in 2014.

Mark-Steve Bushong Smoky Days donation photo (800x600)

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Dark and Stormy Night

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Yes, I'm a nerd.

Astrid and Walter
 We're listening to classical music in the office while making corrections to The No-Camfire Girls and getting a new proof ready.

Yes, I'm dull. But there are worse things you could do on a Saturday night.

Not maybe: May, for book launch

Dark and Stormy Night
 Look for an upcoming blog tour in conjunction with the May release of The No-Campfire Girls; thanks to my Google group The Ink-Slingers League for getting the ball rolling on that. We were slowed down in setup work because Emily had a stomach bug, but she feels better and we're still shooting for publication in a few weeks.

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